Redundancy

I've got to hope that this guy's not this stupid. However, his hints of irony and satire, if present, are so subtle as to be invisible . . .

Stop the Melting Madness

Dear Editor,

I am sure that if you have been out on the trails of our wonderful mountains lately you have noticed the snow is disappearing rapidly, and there are rocks and trees poking through at levels seemingly unprecedented in the memory of those of us that pay attention to such things. It is heartbreaking to see their majestic finery slipping away so early.

Ah, the locals say, global warming is to blame! They have seen the movie by Albert Gore and are convinced, and even our own Aspen Skiing Co. is buying it. But the true culprit is right under their noses, on the faces of their watches, foisted upon us by another sainted Democrat - one Franklin Delano Roosevelt!

Yes, my friends, I am speaking of the insidious evil known as daylight-saving time! When we switched our clocks ahead on March 10, we not only lost an hour of sleep for one night, we added an hour of sunlight to every evening until next November. Any fool can tell you that afternoon sun is the hottest sun, as that is the hottest part of the day! Think of the damage an extra hour of solar radiation does to the snow on our mountains. And this year, with a Democrat Congress, daylight saving time was moved up four weeks, adding all that extra melting time. It will be a wonder if there is even a snow bank left to play in when April rolls around.

Now if the time for all right-thinking Americans to call their congressman (sic) to tell them that this madness must stop, before Aspen and its economy melts away.

David K. Gibson
Aspen

Either that or he's a Republican. Oh, right, that's redundant.